Blondes Have More Fun?
by Row
Summary: Hermione thinks going blonde is the answer to her problem. Will it get her what she wants and open his eyes?
1. Pity Party

Blondes Have More Fun  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing. For entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is meant.  
  
Chapter 1-Pity Party  
  
Hermione Granger stared at herself in the mirror and let out a long self- pitying sigh. She had been staring intently for about twenty minutes. In fact, she had been staring in the mirror without blinking for so long that her image had become blurry and distorted. She shut her eyes tightly for several seconds and mumbled something under her breath. She opened her eyes.  
  
Damn.  
  
She let out another self-pitying sigh. It was the same image as always staring back at her. The same unruly brunette curls framing boring brown eyes, an average complexion, typical lips and an unremarkable mouth. At least that was all she could see.  
  
No wonder no one asked you to the ball. Who would want to be seen with you?  
  
She shook her head forcing herself to stop looking in the bloody mirror. This was ridiculous! She cursed herself for engaging in her little pity party. If she wanted a different look then nobody was stopping her. With a determined look she rose quickly from her bed, startling a sleeping Crookshanks, and went towards Pavarti's dresser which was full of her seemingly endless supply of grooming and magical hair care products.  
  
Hermione attempted to pull her hair back and fasten it into one of Pavarti's delicate hair clips. It took some twisting, pulling and yanking but she managed to get her hair to somewhat resemble the style that always looked so nice on Pavarti. She placed her hands on either side of her face and pulled the skin back trying to make her complexion look smoother like Cho's. She awkwardly puckered her lips trying to make them look more pouty and full like Padma's. She looked in the mirror.  
  
Eeeekkk!  
  
The image was far from the ravishing sex goddess she had hoped to see. She resembled a cross between Dobie the house elf and an evil clown. Almost as if in agreement with her assessment her hair sprang free of it is choking style, sending the clip sailing across the room with such velocity that it became impaled in the wood of her bedpost. She stared at the clip sticking out of her bedpost incredulously as she pushed her mass of freed curls out of her face.  
  
See Hermione, you do have something none of the other Hogwarts girls have.who else has hair that can be considered a deadly weapon?  
  
In an overly dramatic fashion, she threw herself onto her bed and covered her eyes with her hands, her brown locks fanning out about her. Suddenly a little pity party didn't seem like such a bad idea. She lay on her back and absent-mindedly stroked a purring Crookshanks, who had jumped up beside her. It didn't really bother her that it was two days before the ball and she was the only girl she knew without a date. Nope. It didn't bother her that everyone she knew seemed to be looking forward to the event. She didn't mind that not one boy had asked her to go. Not a big deal. She would have rather spent the time reading a good book anyway. But as head girl she was expected to attend school functions.dateless or not.  
  
Dateless. Dateless. Dateless. Dateless.  
  
The word repeated in her head. Sure, she could have written Victor Krum and invited him. He probably would have apparated there in an instant. But she had spent a long time establishing that she only wanted to be friends with him, and she didn't want to give him any false hope. Besides, she didn't really want to go with Victor anyway.  
  
Although. it might be nice to show up on the arm of THE Victor Krum.  
  
Hermione felt a twinge of guilt. She may have been pathetic, unattractive and dateless, but she certainly would never use a person just to make herself feel better. And Victor was a nice person, no matter what Ron said about him.  
  
Ron! That prat!  
  
Ron Weasley had his date for the ball almost as soon as it had been announced a month ago.not that she cared who Ron went with. Yes, as soon as Dumbledore had announced the ball in the great hall a month ago, Ron had been approached by Phoebe Parker, a sixth year Ravenclaw. She was a pretty, blonde petite girl. She wasn't gorgeous or anything, certainly no veela, but she seemed to have an air of confidence around her that drew people in.especially male people. Hermione could see still see her making her way over to where they had been sitting after the ball announcement. That confident sure-of-herself attitude that was so apparent when she walked. She had walked right up to him and smiled.  
  
"Hi Ronald." She shot him a self-assured grin. "How are you?"  
  
Nobody calls him Ronald!  
  
"Uh.hullo.Phoebe. I'm fine.er.good."  
  
Ron.always the smooth talker.  
  
Well to make a long boring story short, Phoebe made quick work of making Ron her date for the Ball. She had made is seem so effortless. She had wanted something and she didn't hesitate to get it. She wanted Ron and she got Ron, simple as that.  
  
She got my Ron.  
  
Hermione sat up. Ron was certainly not hers. He was her best friend and she loved him.like a best friend. Sure, she knew him better than she knew herself, but that's just how best friends were supposed to be. They were just friends and they harbored only.friendly feelings towards each other.  
  
Liar!  
  
Okay, so there had been some.occurrences over the years. Times when she had thought she had felt some.thing between them:  
  
Instances when she had caught him looking at her during class or when they were playing chess, and the look had seemed.hungry. A rush of electricity that she had felt once or twice.or more, when his arm had innocently brushed against hers. Moments when he had smiled at her when he noticed her gazing at him during class. A nano-second when their eyes had locked when she kissed him on the cheek before his first quidditch game. And once when she had woken up in the hospital wing in the middle of the night and realized that he was there. His head resting next to hers, those lovely red lashes covering his sleeping eyes. His hands protectively covering her own. His calm breath on her lips. Blue eyes staring into brown eyes. No words but silent understanding between them. Shutting her eyes feeling totally secure.so close. She had woken up the next morning and he was not there and she always wondered if it had just been a dream.but secretly she hoped not.  
  
Sounds like a bit more then friendship. Why don't you just admit you l-  
  
"Oh shut up already!" Hermione silenced her increasingly annoying inner voice with her outer one.  
  
She hopped off her bed and grabbed a piece of parchment and quill. She was tired of thinking about Ron. There was no reason in admitting anything to herself, because obviously any perceived feelings she had felt from him was just friendship. And those occurrences were just misperceived by her, or maybe they never even existed at all. She needed to forget about Ron and concentrate on the matter at hand. It was time to take a logical approach to her problem. She scribbled on the parchment:  
  
GOAL: Meet new and interesting individuals while cultivating meaningful and intellectually stimulating relationships for future endeavors and ongoing undertakings of both personal and/or professional nature.  
  
Ummm.the ball is in two days, a little honesty may be called for.and a little plain English.  
  
Hermione sighed. Fine. She dipped her quill into the ink and drew a long black line through her above statement. She wrote once again.  
  
GOAL: Get a bloke to take you to the bloody ball.  
  
Now that's honest!  
  
Hermione stared at her goal statement. It was crude but true. She felt foolish but at the same time strangely uplifted. This was how she liked to solve problems, with logical thought. Now she just needed a logical method to accomplish her goal. She wrote another line.  
  
METHODS TO ACCOMPLISH GOAL: Create new outlets through various innovative scenarios and personal metamorphosis, aimed at heightening response from perceived sources of interest. Aforementioned scenarios and metamorphosis may be of a shocking and extreme nature.  
  
Whahhaaa???  
  
Hermione bit her lip as she starred at the big words she had written on the parchment. Even she had no idea what she meant. She sighed and flopped back, sinking into her bed pillows. This was a hopeless waste of time. What could she do in two days to change herself, let alone a shocking change?  
  
She was about give up and rejoin the pity party when her eyes fell on Lavender's copy of With-it Witch Weekly laying on the nightstand. On the cover was a picture of some female super-witch Hermione vaguely remembered seeing on the cover of other silly fashion magazines. She was draped in dazzling silver sexy robes that hugged her figure with a long slit up one side. They certainly were not Hogwarts standard issue robes. The super- witch was holding her wand up to her full pouty red lips seductively. Her large green eyes contrasted nicely against her long straight flaxen blonde hair that fell naturally yet somehow perfectly around her face. The words next to her picture read: Working Magic on your Image: What Hot Hot Hot Witches Want. Pg. 25 Also, how to charm off 10 pounds in 10 minutes! Pg. 65  
  
Blonde eh? Don't they have more fun?  
  
The muggle saying popped into her head and Hermione bolted upright her eyes wide. Blonde! That was it. She grabbed her quill and quickly drew another long black line through her methods statement. She wrote again.  
  
METHODS TO ACCOMPLISH GOAL: Go Blonde!!  
  
If that wasn't shocking and extreme what was? Hermione leapt off the bed and grabbed the magazine. She had to get to the library. She had some.research to do.  
  
A/N: Before anyone jumps down my throat about the blonde thing, I just want to say that I don't necessarily think blondes have more fun. I myself am a brunette and I think I have plenty of fun. So please don't yell at me, this is just in good fun. Also, the charm 10 pounds in 10 minutes was just my own wishful thinking. ( Reviews are appreciated since I'm new at this. 


	2. Blonde Ambition

Chapter 2-Blonde Ambition  
  
Hermione stood just outside the doors of the Great Hall listening to the sound of the chatter from inside. She swallowed nervously, wringing her hands together. She wasn't sure she had the guts to go through with this after all. She twisted a lock of hair near her face around her index finger. It was a nervous habit she had done a million times before, except that this time instead of a curly brunette lock bouncing back into position, a long strand of extremely straight, extremely blonde hair fell smoothly into place around her face.  
  
The spell had been surprisingly simple once she got the hang of it. She had practiced on Crookshanks, not that she would ever tell Ron she had temporarily turned her own cat green. The tricky part had been getting just the right shade. She had gone through several shades of blonde; strawberry, dishwater, sunshine, honey, wheat, bleached platinum, (scary) before she had decided on her current shade which was, well, quite blonde. Not scary blonde but as close as she could get to the color of the super-witch on the magazine. Yes, Hermione Granger was a flaxen blonde.  
  
She had also taken the time to find a decent straightening spell. The spell was actually to smooth facial wrinkles (the Botox of the wizzarding world if you will) but Hermione had modified it a bit and she found it much easier than the gobs of magical hair gel it would have taken to keep her hair under control. Plus the spell had given her hair nice smooth waves that she really thought went well with her new blonde hairstyle. After that she had gotten a little carried away. To compliment her new hair color she had also chosen a new eye color to boot. She looked at her reflection in a nearby mirror for the millionth time. She smiled nervously. Light green eyes framed by smooth blonde locks stared back at her. She most certainly looked different, but was it better? Had she gone overboard? Would this help her to accomplish her goal? There was only way to find out. She took a deep breath. It was now or never.  
  
Hermione stepped into the hall holding her breath. One step. Two steps. Three steps. The chattering continued at its usual rate as she headed towards the Gryffindor table. Her nervousness was quickly turning into disappointment. Apparently going blonde was not nearly as shocking as she has thought-  
  
"AHHHHH!!! HERMIONE!! YOUR HAIRRR!!" The familiar shrieks of Lavender and Pavarti startled Hermione and she only had a moment to recover as her fellow bunkmates accosted her.  
  
"YOUR EYES!!"  
  
"IT'S STRAIGHT!"  
  
"THEY'RE GREEN!"  
  
"IS IT A WIG?"  
  
"WHAT SPELL DID YOU USE?"  
  
"OH MY GOD! YOU HAVE TO SHOW US HOW TO DO THAT!"  
  
A small but increasing circle of curious girls oooing and ahhing suddenly surrounded Hermione, several being so bold as to reach out and examine long strands. Hermione was feeling a bit overwhelmed. The chattering had definitely died down and she could feel a lot of eyes on her.  
  
"Do.do you like it?" she questioned nervously.  
  
"It's amazing Hermione! You look great!!" said Pavarti. A few Ravenclaw girls standing nearby nodded in agreement. Hermione felt her confidence grow as more girls admired her new look. Maybe this was the change she needed after all. She suddenly couldn't wait to show Harry and Ginny and..other people her new look. She tried to peer over a couple of the girl's shoulders but Ron and Harry always sat at the opposite end of the table. Hermione tried to break away.  
  
"Um.well thanks. I'm just going to get some supper," she said trying to slip away politely.  
  
"Come eat with us," said Lavender, grabbing Hermione's arm and dragging her towards the table. Hermione reluctantly agreed as she sat down, several more girls examining her hair and eyes. This wasn't exactly the attention she had been hoping for. She felt more like a science experiment gone wrong than a super-witch beauty. The doubt crept back into her mind. Maybe this was a big mistake. She looked up eyeing her escape route, but caught the eye of a sixth-year Hufflepuff named Ian Grant looking instead. He was cute. He smiled at her. Really cute. Despite her nervousness, Hermione smiled back shyly. Maybe this was not such a big mistake.  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
Ron, Harry and Ginny mulled over a levitating makeshift diagram of a quidditch field Ron had created with carrot sticks and bagels. He was using celery sticks to represent himself and Harry as they plotted out possible strategies for tomorrow's match. He levitated a nearby breadstick into the scene.  
  
"Now Gin, you're the breadstick. When they try to go after Collin, the licorice stick, I want you to fly like this." Ron sent Ginny's breadstick whizzing past the opposing teams candy canes. He glanced up at his sister only to see that her head was craned in the opposite direction looking towards the entrance to the great hall, eyes squinted.  
  
"Ahemmm," Ron cleared his throat shooting her an annoyed look. Ginny turned her head back towards Ron and Harry.  
  
"Sorry Ron. Just wondering what all the commotion was about." She craned her neck missing Ron's second annoyed look. Ron vaguely heard shrill girly shrieks coming from up front.  
  
"Sounds like a typical Lavender-has-a-new-hairstyle shriek to me," joked Dean pretending to puff up a fake hairdo and batting his eyes. Harry and Seamus smirked while Ginny continued to strain her neck to see.  
  
"No. I don't think it's Lavender," she said.  
  
"Come on Gin, we've got a big match tomorrow. You need to concentrate on the task-"  
  
"Oh my goodness! Is that who I think it is?" Ginny interrupted Ron, jumping up and heading towards the opposite end of the table without another look back at Ron and Harry.  
  
"-task at hand," Ron finished as he watched her whiz away. He glared after her.  
  
"C'mon mate, let it go," said Harry. "We've been practicing and going over strategy all week. I think we're as ready as we can possibly be." Ron huffed, continuing to maneuver food items around the edible field.  
  
"That's just fine Harry. We've got the biggest match of the year tomorrow against Hufflepuff, but just let her go off and act all.all.girly," Ron said exasperated. Harry tried to suppress his grin. It was truly amazing how serious Ron could be about quidditch. "Not to mention," Ron continued, " that for whatever reason, that Hufflepuff has been remarkably good this year."  
  
"Yah, that Ian Grant is amazing!" said Collin who was sitting next to Ginny's empty spot. "He is like the next Viktor Krum or something. I mean when he scored on Ron like four, or was it five times, last match it was just totally amazing!"  
  
"Yah Collin. Grant is good but we're ready for him this time," said Harry watching Ron who was still focused on his diagram but whose ears were getting quite red.  
  
"But the way he zigged-zagged on that broom and just flew circles around Ron every time he tried to head him off-"  
  
A swift kick from Harry under the table cut Collin off mid-sentence. Harry noticed that Ron had a death grip on his wand and he figured he better shut Collin up before it was Collin's neck being strangled. Ron swallowed and looked up. Harry could tell he was trying to keep his cool.  
  
"Yes Collin, Grant's a good player and he did score on me three times, but that's why myself and the rest of us are going to be extra-prepared for tomorrow's match," he said sternly. "Especially you Collin.right? Everyone has to pull their weight this match." Collin who finally realized he was irritating his captain nodded aggressively, before excusing himself.  
  
"Don't even look at me like that," said Ron, noticing Harry's disapproving look.  
  
"You were a bit hard on him don't you think? He does the best he can, and he has gotten much better."  
  
Ron sighed running a hand through his red hair. "Yah I know. I'll apologize to him later. I just get so worked up before a big match."  
  
"I noticed. Luckily, the more worked up you get the better you usually play," said Harry. "But seriously, why don't you try and relax a bit, play some chess.do some homework.  
  
"Thanks Harry. I'll definitely think about that chess idea," he laughed. Ron felt better as he watched the celery sticks dart past the candy canes. They were prepared for tomorrow's match. Maybe a good game of chess was just what he needed to relax. He would go find Hermione right after dessert and harass her into playing with him. He had barely seen her all week between his non-stop quidditch practices and her non-stop studying. He really did miss her. It was funny how the person he had most rows with was also the person who he was most relaxed around.  
  
He was a bit surprised she hadn't come down for supper. He smiled as a familiar image of Hermione appeared in his mind, curled up in a library chair with her head resting between the pages of an open book, wild curls fanned out about her, totally oblivious to the rest of the world. Yes, that was Hermione.  
  
Ron decided that as soon as he finished his 3rd slice of pumpkin pie he would go and bring Hermione Granger back into real world. He shoveled another piece of pie onto his plate as he watched a candy cane fly out of the way of a zooming celery stick. He.er.Gryffindor were so going to kick Ian Grant's.er.Hufflepuff's arses tomorrow.  
  
Ron was lost in his thoughts as Ginny ran towards him dragging someone by the hand with her.  
  
"Hey Harry, Ron. I want you to meet my friend," she said practically giggling. Ron looked up but whoever it was, she was standing behind Ginny and all he could make out was a wisp of blonde hair. Suddenly Ginny moved aside.  
  
The bite of pie Ron had just taken fell out of his gaping mouth and his wand slipped from his hand causing a cascade of donuts, candy canes, celery and carrot sticks to fall from the air and land all over the table.  
  
"I think you know Hermione," said Ginny smiling.  
  
Ron stared incredulously. It was Hermione, but not Hermione. It was some kind of trick. Ron blinked stunned into silence. Next to him, Harry was doing a slightly better job of keeping it together.  
  
"Wow, Hermione. You're.blonde. It's uh.really.different.er.nice," Harry stammered.  
  
"You hate it, don't you?" she said her face falling.  
  
"No, honestly. It was just a bit of a shock. But really, it's nice," he said sincerely.  
  
"It's hot!" commented Dean letting out playful catcall and winking at Hermione playfully.  
  
"Thanks Harry, Dean" she said smiling and blushing furiously. She turned towards Ron who was still starring at her his eyes wide. So far, everyone had reacted pretty well to her new look. "So what do you think Ron?" She tried to ask casually.  
  
Ron just starred. She had done something to her hair and instead of the rich colored curls that were almost alive, it was straight hanging limply around her face and it was.blondish. Some bizarre shade that he was certain he could never get used to. On top of that, her eyes, her normally big brown expressive eyes that reminded him of the color of chocolate frogs.were green. A green like.like split pea soup. He hated split pea soup. He swallowed. She was waiting for his answer. He knew he was supposed to say something nice, a compliment perhaps. But this was Hermione, who he was used to being totally honest with, and his true feelings flew out of his mouth before he could stop them.  
  
"Hermione, you look bloody ridiculous!" He knew it was a mistake. Big. Huge. Mistake.  
  
Hermione's face fell. She hadn't necessarily expected him to tell her she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, but just the way he had said, what he said made her heart break. She felt tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. She couldn't even look at him.  
  
"Hermione, I just meant that-"  
  
Hermione didn't give him the chance to explain. The last thing he saw was blonde hair trailing behind her as she ran from the great hall.  
  
"Really brilliant Ron," said Harry, sounding irritated. Ginny spun on her heel and narrowed her eyes glaring at Ron.  
  
"Here's a little bit of strategy for you, big brother. When a girl asks you if you like her new hair style, DON'T EVER SAY THAT!!" She shook her head and shot him one more glare before turning and rushing off to find Hermione.  
  
Ron looked down at his pie. He has lost his appetite.  
  
A/N: Silly boys...they never say the right thing. ( Thank you to my very helpful beta and for the reviews. They are much appreciated. 


	3. Fightin' Words and Color Wars

Chap. 3- Fightin' Words and Color Wars  
  
Hermione felt the tears stinging at her eyes as she fled the Great Hall. She was upset over what Ron had said to her, but even more upset because of the way she was reacting. This had all been a terrible idea. She had just fled the great hall when she smacked right into someone on their way in. She struggled to regain her composure.  
  
"Malfoy," she said her eyes narrowing cautiously. She was not in the mood.  
  
Malfoy looked at her wide-eyed for a moment before snickering, an evil smile crossing his features as he took in her new blonde look.  
  
"I guess it was only a matter of time eh mudblood?" He said slowly running a hand through his own white blonde locks.  
  
Oh god. Now she was certain this was a mistake. Not being in the mood to have it out with Malfoy, she ignored the comment and breezed past him. She rushed through the corridors. She didn't want to see anyone, until she undid this mess, but just then someone grabbed her arm spinning her around. Hermione assumed it was Ron with some bumbling apology for her and she was not in the mood.  
  
"Don't even try to apologize Ro-R-R-on," she stammered realizing it was not Ron standing before her. Hermione was utterly surprised. It was Ian Grant.  
  
"Hi Hermione. Sorry to startle you, but you were running kinda fast there."  
  
"Oh...hi...Ian." She tried to keep her voice at a normal level. "I was just on my to...uhh...the library."  
  
"Oh, I should spend more time there," he joked and shot her a dashing smile.  
  
Hermione had never really spoken directly with Ian before. Of course, she had noticed him in some of their classes, but gods, up close he was really something. Perfect teeth, perfect lips, perfect dimples and perfect green eyes.  
  
"Well, uh, it's open until ten o'clock," she said cringing inwardly at her lame response. But Ian smiled that perfect smile again.  
  
"Yah, well maybe I'll drop in for a study session sometime."  
  
"Oh, were you looking for help with your studies?" That at least made sense as to why one of the hottest guys at Hogwarts was talking to her.  
  
Ian laughed again. (a perfect laugh) and stepped a little closer to her.  
  
"No actually I'm doing okay with my studies. I wanted to tell you that I really like your hair," he said leaning in a bit. "And your eyes."  
  
Hermione was stunned. She was just about to run to her room and undo all her beauty voodoo.  
  
"Oh, thank you," she said. "I really wasn't sure about it myself."  
  
"Really? I think it really suits you." Hermione felt her cheeks go red. Was it possible that Ian Grant was flirting with her? He reached casually towards her face, his finger just barely grazing a strand of blond hair.  
  
"Yah, it's like I'm seeing you in a whole new light."  
  
"You mean like daylight?" Hermione was still baffled, but Ian seemed to think she was the funniest thing ever and responded with a perfect sounding chuckle.  
  
"You're a sweetheart, you know that Hermione?"  
  
"Me? I mean yes I know that...err...I mean not like that...but...umm...thank you," she finally managed.  
  
"So Hermione. I've kept you from the library long enough. But how about you taking a walk with me sometime tomorrow if you're not too busy?"  
  
"Yah. Absolutely. Anytime would be great. I'm always free." She cringed inwardly yet again. So much for playing hard to get.  
  
"Great. I have quidditch practice before dinner for an hour, but how about meeting me after that?"  
  
"That sounds nice."  
  
"Okay then. It's a date," he said smiling.  
  
"Yes, a date," she smiled back.  
  
"Alright, see you tomorrow...Blondie," he said shooting her a wink and a smile before he strode away.  
  
Hermione watched him as it dawned on her that she was Blondie. She was stunned. Five minutes ago she had been on the verge of tears and now she was Blondie, and a sweetheart, and the best looking guy in school had just asked her on a date. Who cared what Ron thought about her new look. She was accomplishing her goal in a big way. It was just like Ian had said. It was Hermione Granger in a whole new light. She spun on her heels, feeling practically giddy as she headed toward the common room. She couldn't wait to tell Ginny.  
  
Ron felt like a jerk as he headed towards the common room. He never meant to say things to hurt her, so how did he always manage to put his foot in his mouth? He still didn't like her hair, but he knew Hermione. She was a sensible girl. Actually, she was the most sensible girl. He would apologize of course, but he wouldn't be surprised if she was back to her normal look already.  
  
Ron entered through the portrait hole and he looked immediately to the area where they usually sat in the corner, but he only saw Harry copying something onto parchment. He headed towards him not surprised to see the large cushy chair Hermione usually occupied empty. She was obviously still upset with him. Harry looked up as Ron took a seat.  
  
"So did you apologize yet?"  
  
"Well, she wasn't in the library or her usual hiding places. I guess she's still up in her room cursing my name."  
  
"You better hope that's all she's cursing," said Harry. "Besides she's not in her room, she's right there." Harry motioned to the opposite side of the common room.  
  
Ron looked over to where a group of six or seven girls were sitting, including Ginny, Lavender, Pavrati, and Hermione. A very much still-blonde- haired Hermione. Ron narrowed his eyes at the scene. She was laughing and talking and even giggling. All the girls were leaning in listening to whatever Hermione was saying, and periodically they would all shriek or start giggling before leaning in again. It wasn't like he hadn't witnessed Hermione and Ginny do the girl talk thing before, but somehow Blond Hermione at the center of gossipy girl central just didn't look right.  
  
Ron starred at her for awhile, willing her to look over at him, but she never so much as turned her head in his direction. Ron grumbled as he threw himself down in the chair across from Harry who looked up taking in his disgusted look.  
  
"You know Ron, it can be difficult to apologize to someone telepathically."  
  
"Well clearly, she's too busy...gabbing to want to bother working out a small problem with one of her best friends."  
  
"A small problem? Ron, you told her she looked ridiculous in front of everyone."  
  
"Well she did...does."  
  
"RON! You hurt her feelings!" Harry was in no mood to deal with their latest row.  
  
"All right, calm down. I'm going."  
  
Ron stood up and slowly headed over to where Hermione was still sitting with the other girls. He approached slowly and stopped a few feet away. As he approached he strained to hear what they were saying, but all he caught was something about perfect teeth.  
  
"Ahemmm," he said clearing his throat. The group of girls all stopped talking and looked up at him, including blonde Hermione. Ron forced a smile even though he was just never going to be used to seeing her that way.  
  
"Uh, hello...everyone. Hermione, can I talk to you?"  
  
"Sure Ron, what's up?" She spoke like nothing at all was the matter. She even smiled sweetly at him.  
  
Ron was caught off guard. He was used to angry Hermione, irritated Hermione, ignoring-him-Hermione. He knew how to deal with that, but this pleasant unbothered Hermione was a new one, and it was unnerving.  
  
"Well I wanted to talk to you about earlier."  
  
"Oh. That. You were just not used to my new look. Don't worry about it." She smiled again.  
  
"Umm...Okay. Great then."  
  
Ron watched as they went back to their chit chat. He was baffled. There had been enough arguments and apologies between Hermione and himself that he knew how they went. It was practically an art form. They were full of words and emotion and more words and more emotions, and eventually understanding. But never ever had an apology gone quite like that. He hadn't even gotten the chance to explain himself or say he was sorry properly. She had just blown the whole thing off.  
  
Ron started walking back towards Harry. Maybe he should be glad it went over so well. Maybe they had matured, and didn't need to do the whole emotional wordy apology thing anymore. After all, it was a stupid incident anyway. Yes, that was it, they had both grown. Ron walked by some fifth year girls feeling unconvinced.  
  
"I can't believe it. She goes blonde and Ian Grants asks her out. It's so unfair," Ron overheard one of the girls say to the other.  
  
Ron stopped in his tracks. He felt his entire body stiffen. Now, there was an off chance they were talking about some other girl and there was no reason to overreact, so why was he already marching back to where Hermione was sitting before he even finished the thought?  
  
"I need to talk to you Hermione," he said sternly, interrupting her conversation.  
  
"Later, okay Ron?" She said barely looking up at him.  
  
"No. Not Okay. I need to talk to you now."  
  
Her head snapped up, and her eyes narrowed. She was not happy with him.  
  
"I said that we could talk later Ron," she said in a voice that clearly implied he was treading on thin ice. But Ron didn't care.  
  
"Now Hermione," he said stepping forward, grabbing her wrist and pulling her up to her feet. He could practically feel her anger rising as he led her to the empty corner of the common room. He turned around to face her.  
  
"What do you think you're doing Ron?"  
  
"Well how funny, that was going to be my question actually Hermione?" She gave him a baffled look.  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"What do you think I'm talking about? Ian Grant. Ian Grant! Since when and why could you be dating Ian Grant?" He spat at her.  
  
"Since today for your information and because he asked me. Now I'm going." She started walking away. She was not going to let him get to her.  
  
"How could you date that pretty boy moron?"  
  
"He is not either of those things. You just don't like him because he plays quidditch on the opposing team. You don't even know Ian."  
  
"Well, I may not know him, but I know of him, and besides you don't know him either!" Ron said his frustration rising.  
  
"Well, that's why I'm going on a date with him, besides I know he likes my new look."  
  
"Let me get this straight. That could-for-nothing-playboy-can't-stop- looking-in-the-mirror-at-himself-for-two-seconds gives you one compliment after six years of never looking your way and you're head over heels for the jerk?  
  
"I am not head over heels for...for anyone! I am just going on a date with him. That's all! Besides Ron, is that what you're really angry about, or is it because I didn't let your mean comment send me into hiding in my room and undo all this," she said motioning at her hair. "That's what you were expecting wasn't it? I mean one comment from Ian Grant shouldn't have any effect on me at all, but oh, one thoughtless, stupid comment from Ron Weasley and I'm supposed to just come to my senses, because if Ron Weasley thinks I'm rubbish then I must be rubbish!"  
  
"I don't think your rubbish. I would never think that about you!" He was in shock over Hermione's outburst.  
  
"No, you just think I look like rubbish, and the guy I'm going on a date with is rubbish. That's all, right Ron? Well, I've had enough." She turned and started walking away.  
  
"What is it Hermione, some of that blonde hair magic ooze into your brain?"  
  
Hermione spun on her heels. "What is that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Well, you tell me. You're blonde for one day and you're acting like rubbish, ignoring your friends and dating the biggest prat in the school."  
  
"How dare you speak to me that way," she said closing in on him. "Just because you don't like my hair or Ian does not give you the right to speak to me like that. Especially when the only person who acted like a prat today is you."  
  
"Oh that's another thing. We didn't even have a proper apology."  
  
Hermione slapped the palm of her hand to her forehead. "I cannot believe you Ron. You actually want to have a row over an apology? Are you sure there's no magic affecting your brain?"  
  
"Hey, I'm not the one with fake hair, ignoring her friends and dating prats."  
  
"It's not fake hair!" So much for not letting him get to her. "And just because I was chatting with some people besides you for a few minutes does not mean I was ignoring my friends, and just because Ian can fly circles around you on the quidditch field does NOT make him a prat!!"  
  
It was a low blow but she was so mad at this point her hands were shaking. She turned and started marching towards the stairs to her dorm. Meanwhile all of Gryfindor was curiously watching their latest row unfold.  
  
Ron had never taken blows to his pride well, and this was no exception.  
  
"Yah, that Ian's a great guy, and to think, you only had to turn yourself into a blonde bimbo to get him to take you out." He regretted it the minute he said it, but part of him had to get a rise out of her.  
  
Hermione stopped in her tracks. She was so hurt and angry. She was either going to burst into tears or just burst Ron. She fought down her tears as she approached him. Ron waited for the onslaught. Hermione took several deep breaths before replying in the calmest voice she could muster.  
  
"First of all, who I date is none of your business. Secondly, I'm sorry that I mean so little to you that you could think that about me, and finally, I don't ever want to talk to you again. She turned and walked away.  
  
Ron was left standing there. His anger causing him to take deep shaky breaths. Where did she get off being all calm. He wanted her to scream at him, engage him, the way they always did. But instead she was calmly walking away. He should have let her go, because he knew enough damage had been done. He could feel Harry's eyes on him, pleading with him to stop, but instead he raised his wand and pointed it at Hermione.  
  
"Reversio pigmentus!" He shouted as a blaze of color shot out his wand and hit Hermione.  
  
Hermione shrieked as she felt the spell hit her scalp. Her hair. She reached up to her head. That prat! He had turned it back. It was bushy brown again fanning out in every direction.  
  
"You prat! Do you know how long it took me to get the color right!!" She forgot about being calm and leveled her wand at him.  
  
"Pigmento," she shouted.  
  
A bolt of light hit Ron before he could move and he looked up noting the surprised look on his fellow students faces. He fingered several locks of his hair. He was blonde. Platinum blonde.  
  
"Who's the blonde bimbo now?" Hermione chided him, but before she could even chuckle a bolt of light hit her and her robes were suddenly saturated with purple.  
  
"Awwww... Purple goes great with your hair Hermione, you should really show--- "  
  
Boom! A bolt of color splattered above his head covering the wall with green and most of Ron. Oh fine. Two could play at this game.  
  
And then it was chaos. Color Chaos. Bolts of pigment shot across the common room along with Hermione and Ron's insults. The Gryfindors who hadn't been smart enough to make a hasty exit earlier were now running for cover as Ron and Hermione continued to throw curses of color at each other.  
  
Boom! The fire burned neon pink. Pow! The chairs and sofa were turquoise and yellow. Wham! The walls were orange. Pop! The floor was red polka dots.  
  
Neville got a bolt of beige right in the bum as he ran for cover. Harry was repaid for attempting to intervene with an array of green stripes across his face. Several students slid across the pigment slicked floor in an attempt to escape. The sloppy spell throwing left the color oozing down the walls, into the furniture, coating portraits, and clinging to the ceiling in a mad tie-dye effect.  
  
Ron slid across the floor and behind the now multi-colored sofa breathing heavily. He was pretty multi-colored himself, green and orange dripping from his locks, his robes stained with red and purple polka dots, but he didn't care. He was going to be the victor of this color war.  
  
Hermione's back was pressed against a now magenta armchair, her wand at the ready. She pushed her mass of rainbow curls back and wiped her orange polka dot forehead with the back of her gold striped hand. She was going to win this color war. She just needed one more direct shot.  
  
Suddenly there was movement by the portrait hole. They both saw it. The opportunity to take the other out. Both appeared from their respective hiding places wands pointed.  
  
"PIGMENTO!!" They both shouted in unison at the figure stepping through the portrait hole.  
  
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!!" Shouted a familiar voice.  
  
Hermione and Ron's mutual expressions of victory changed immediately to horror and dismay as they beheld the sight before them.  
  
Professor McGonagall was standing before them, drenched in color. She was a kaleidoscope of changing colors. Blues and reds mixed into purples, and orange polka dots mixed with turquoise stripes. Color covered her hat, her face, her robes. The color was still changing pigments as it oozed down her face and into her hair. Droplets of red pigment dripped from the tip of her nose as she took in the destruction to the common room.  
  
"Again, Ms. Granger, Mr. Weasley, I ask you, what is the meaning of this?" She was obviously attempting to keep her cool.  
  
McGonagall leveled her gaze at Hermione, but all she could do was make a few whimpering sounds and shake her head lamely. She had no words to explain. She dropped her eyes towards the floor.  
  
Ron shifted from foot to foot. McGonagall was looking right at him now with an icy expression. Ron took in the scene around him.  
  
"Redecorating,'' he replied lamely.  
  
Detention was really a foregone conclusion. It was only a matter of how much detention.  
  
A/N: Thanks to my Beta and sorry it takes me forever to update. I'm a slow thinker. ;) Reviews are absolutely appreciated. 


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